Dirty Bill's

"Do you have a vape?"

"Ah, no, sorry."

"Oh my god I would suck the quarters out of a vending machine for a vape right now."

"I have cigarettes."

"GROSS."

"Sorry, that's all I got. What's your name?"

"Kaleigh. What's yours?"

"Jordan. You know it's not really Mad Dog."

"WHAT?!"

"IT DOESN'T REALLY STAND FOR MAD DOG!"

"Ohhhhh. Really? What does it stand for?"

"It's not Mad Dog 20/20, it's actually…"

"Hold on, I'm getting a call. YES WE'RE HERE. At @dirtybills. Oh yeah. Packed nuts to butts in here. Yeah. Hell yeah. Hell yeah. No cap. Cool. No, my mom's boyfriend dropped us off. Ok. … Ok, sorry, what were you saying?"

"I was saying the MD in MD 20/20 doesn't stand for Mad Dog, it stands for Mogen David."

"Morgan David?"

"MOGEN DAVID!"

"What? No way? Says who?"

"Says Wikipedia. It's the producer. You can look it up yourself!"

"I don't use Wikipedia, I just look things up on Reddit."

"Oh, ok. How's that working out for you?"

"I'm a real estate agent."

"No, I meant. Never mind … How do you like it?"

"It's okay, I'm really trying to do something else. I'm getting my yoga certification and I'm really into human design. Have you heard about human design? I can tell you're a Capricorn. Or Sagittarius. What time were you born?"

"Uhhh I don't know …"

"You should text your mom and ask her. What do you do?"

"I'm a software engineer."

"Oh cool, do you have a boat?"

"Uh no."

"Oh."

"Yeah. Hey, do you want to hear a joke?"

"Uhhh okay."

"An SQL query goes into a bar, walks up to two tables and asks: 'Can I join you?'"

"......."

"That's it, that's the joke."

"Don't talk to me again."