Steve's Place

Thorndale is located just 50 miles from downtown Austin, a veritable stone's throw for some Texans who live out in the dustier stretches of the state. But it felt more like 500 miles when I rolled into town on a quiet winter night, only to find the place was emptier than the University of Oklahoma library. It's not quite a ghost town, but ain't too far off either.

However, there's still one place that's absolutely worth visiting in Thorndale: the memorably dingy Steve's Place, one of the diviest bars I've ever had the pleasure of visiting. This is the type of place that has eternity on its side. You can walk in here and immediately start shooting a horror movie. I'm not sure if this place would close down if a jet engine fell out of the sky right through the roof. Regulars would probably use it as a table and carry on.

I don't know exactly how long Steve's Place has been around, but the liquor license dates back to 1995 and the building itself was a mechanic shop dating back to the 1930s. If you told me there's a weekly fight club in the back that keeps this place afloat I'd probably believe you.

A wood stove anchors the place in the middle and I hear that it does get some use in the colder months. Locals also rave about the burgers here, and visitors might luck out with the occasional crawfish boil or barbecue plate served up. It also looks like the headquarters for a popular annual motorcycle rally named the Louis Run.

Some people will tell you that plywood and shower curtains should not be prevalent in your interior design approach. If you know someone like that, take them here simply to see the expression on their face. And then say you're going out for a smoke and just leave them at the bar for 30 minutes. They'll either die of a heart attack or realize the futility of their highfalutin proclivity.

If there was a Texas Dive Bar Hall of Fame, Steve's Place would be a founding inductee. This place is straight gas. Come on in and ride the lightning.